I went to my childhood home last week.
It was a weird feeling…
I smiled remembering all the good memories I had with my sisters here.
But…
What shocked me was that I felt a small oncoming headache as I stared at the house.
Years ago I would have just summed it up to a lack of water. But I paused to access myself.
Your body has its’ complex ways of reminding you not to go back to harm or discomfort. Your body is trying to have a conversation with you.
I decided to listen.
I realized my hands gripped the steering wheel tightly, my stomach was turning, and I was holding my breath.
Wow.
I hadn’t even noticed.
Why was I feeling this way?
The memories of yelling and fear and control rushed in my mind.
I shut them down. Not tonight.
And reminded myself,
“You no longer live here.”
“You are safe, you are loved.”
As a young girl I had a desire to be a mom, I wanted to prove to myself that I could break the cycle.
“And you did it” I thought to myself as I looked back at my sleeping daughters lovingly.
I smiled as I drove away
with no headache,
with no queasiness,
And hands gently placed.
My body at peace.
If you can relate, this spot is for you.
